god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Randomize
