is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
Jerry, you need to find god
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
How's work?
Spinning.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
