4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
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