new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
cat food counts as protein by the way
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
where are my eyebrows?
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
Randomize
