How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
