no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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