my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
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