Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
Randomize
