I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize
