"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Randomize
