lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
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