I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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