I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
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