PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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