Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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