What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
Randomize
