FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
Randomize
