Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize
