I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
