"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Randomize