her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
Randomize
