Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
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