Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
