Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
I will pee on everything he values.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
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