alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Randomize
