i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Randomize