these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize