So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Randomize
