I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
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