so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
It's Friday. Sex?
at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize