My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
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