I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
Randomize
