Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
Randomize
