You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
Randomize