Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Randomize
