I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
Randomize
