I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
Congratulations! We have a period
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