everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
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