We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Randomize
