I'm going to jail i love you
...so i touched it.
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
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