Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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