Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Randomize
