So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
