Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
