I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
Randomize
