u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
They should really pass out barf bags in church
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
