if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
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