I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
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