You work out of a Hotel?
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
