I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
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